Wednesday, September 15, 2010

To Happytize Or Unhappytize

I started this blog and decided on the name on a day when I thought it was up to me to happytize or unhappytize life. I thought I would grow in the process. You know, when you write something down it becomes clearer, you put your thoughts down on paper (or screen in this case) and suddenly you start to see things in a different light, especially when there is the possibility that someone might actually read them, and this is not exactly the most secretive place to hide a diary. So out of fear of being ridiculed you try to think in a clearer manner and be more objective, kind of a 3rd person way of thinking. So I thought I would become my own third voice. 3rd? God knows there are many more yapping around in my head most of the time just one voice short of being diagnosed with multiple personality disorder.

Yes, I do have all these voices, but not in a bad way at all. I think we all do except we either ignore them or try to appear as if we are so centered that we have only one, sometimes we even lie about having all these voices so as to preserve our image from being tarnished by others trying desperately to muffle their own voices within. I do believe we all have so many voices and the variety depends on how many people we want to impress, how many we want to guide, how many we want to rule, lead, follow, love, hate etc.. I believe we are made up of a collection of characters and voices that do not always coexist happily, hence our ability to happytize or unhappytize our lives. Apparently it all depends on which voice is in command and doing all the talking or what the voices are saying to each other in any moment. If you are blessed they are all singing a beautiful accapella and that is when we feel happier.

Anyway, back to the point, I thought this blog would help me articulate and organize my thoughts. It did not. In fact it only made me question more. A friend always comments on how I always ask questions when I write, which I did not notice until he pointed it out. Maybe to me that was the natural way of how things should be, to always question and to always have several answers that you can discuss with yourself or others. Nothing is finite and no answer is absolute, everything can be viewed in a million different lights.

Maybe the minute we start taking things as is, when we start to believe that there is just one answer for things is the minute we close our minds off and hang that “be right back” sign on our horizons. It would be a pity, so I will take my chances of being viewed by whomever as someone without a stand for the sake of being able (or hoping) to know more. Maybe with knowledge comes more understanding and then with more understanding more compassion and after that less analysis that might open the door for more happiness.

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